Caption Competition 8: Schumacher and Rosberg

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Nico Rosberg, Michael Schumacher, Mercedes W03 launch, Barcelona, 2012

Michael Schumacher and Nico Rosberg are the stars of this week’s Caption Competition.

What did Mercedes’ two stars have to say to each other at the launch of their new F1 car?

It’s up to you to figure it out. Post your best suggestions in the comments.

As usual a selection of the best suggestions will appear in Comment of the Day in the daily round-up.

The picture above is one of many great shots taken for us by Jamey Price in F1 testing at the Circuit de Catalunya last week. See more of Jamey’s excellent photographs here:

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Image © Jamey Price/F1 Fanatic

Author information

Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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141 comments on “Caption Competition 8: Schumacher and Rosberg”

  1. Nico: “Ja?”
    Schu: “Ja!”

  2. NR:”Have I ever told you what beautiful eyes you have?”

    1. Boooo, in before me. +1 to this!

    2. thumbs up for this one

  3. Apparently Mercedes’ engineers did not give their two drivers the memo about the new nose.

  4. Nico: I wish he would shut up about how things used to be so good in the old days.

  5. Damnit, my first ‘First!’ and I missed it.

  6. Schu to Nico: I don’t like the look of yours

  7. Ros: You look like the new car!
    Shu: No, YOU look like the new car!

    1. Haha, :D love it!

      1. For the win!!! lol

  8. “whats that smell?”

  9. Nico: so Ross is pretending we made a step forward, you pretend you still have it and I pretend I’m the future champion?
    Michael: Jawohl, That’s the plan.

  10. Michael: “You’ve aged recently.”
    Nico: “Not as much as you.”

  11. Michael: The reno looks fast.
    Nico: looks like kimi will be on the podium before you.

  12. MSC: No really, It’s Rubens.
    ROS: OMG, It is.
    MSC: Don’t look, he’ll notice

  13. Schumacher: “What did I tell you about dressing the same as me?”

  14. no no nico, I am clearly an inch taller than you…I am number 1

  15. I will win this year Michael, I will!

  16. Nico and Michael practice their ventriloquism.

  17. Rosberg and Schumacher attend the funeral of their 2012 season.

  18. Michael: are you wearing make up..? Nico: Oops i did it again..

    1. georges10099
      3rd March 2012, 21:26

      haha good one :D

    2. I honestly didn’t see that before putting mine!

  19. georges10099
    3rd March 2012, 21:26

    ROS: “Stop staring at it, it cant be that bad can it? It can be solved with a bit of plastic……. oh my it is that bad!”

  20. Chris (@eddie4102000)
    3rd March 2012, 21:29

    The sexual tension at Mercedes was getting ridiculous…

  21. Nico : Ross told me to look beyond 2012.

  22. Michael: You keep beating me, this isn’t fair.
    Nico: Oops, I did it again!

  23. MSC: nico, are those wrinkles under your eyes ?
    ROS: I dare you, I double dare you, say it one more time!
    MSC: whatever you say britney

  24. Nico: Yeah, my Dad told me you used to be really fast when you raced against him!

  25. bradandcoffee
    3rd March 2012, 21:46

    “I’m going to make you my Felipe Massa”

  26. “I’ve just seen the car…”
    “I know, I know. Listen: I was at the ’96 Ferrari launch. Whatever you do, don’t start crying”

    1. Haha! Good one!

  27. Nico: Hey Michael. Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer?… Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!

    Michael: …..Thats not funny…

    Niko: … I hate you.

    1. Brilliant!

  28. Some fighting talk from Rosberg: ‘I may be known as Britney, but you should be called Madonna! Your both old, faded, can’t dance properly and should retire.’

  29. “Nice grimace – brooding…intense”
    “No: I can’t remember where my keys are. At my age I can barely remember where my house is. Who are you by the way?”

  30. “Damn: I forgot whether we’re supposed to say wins or podiums are our goal this year”
    “I just saw the car. Let’s settle for hoping Germany win Euro 2012”

  31. Chris Gascoine
    3rd March 2012, 22:00

    First to blink is No.2….

    1. Hahaha, fantastic! :)

    2. I do like that one!

  32. If looks could kill………

  33. Michael: Booya..i got the number 7 again Nico: I’m A Slave…4 U

  34. MS – “Rossy….if we stand still… we shall still be quicker then the HRT’s!”

  35. Schumi: So, if we are 1-2 Nico in an incident filled race, you will leave me by to win.
    Nico-” You have another thing coming!

  36. Shirleen Riffe
    3rd March 2012, 22:13

    What do you mean you don’t like even numbers?

  37. SCH: Nico are you sure you feel well, you are very pale.
    ROS: It’s that nose, it makes feel sick.

  38. Two Germans laughing

    1. racist but funny :) probably wont make the caption….

      1. Well I hope I didn’t offend anybody! Glad you got the humour! And ya, definitely not caption material! :D

    2. great! like that humor. greetings from germany

  39. Shane (@f1champion18)
    3rd March 2012, 22:17

    ‘Michael, you really gotta do something about your nose!’

  40. MSC: ‘did you take the chicken out the oven?’

    ROS: ‘ ****…’

  41. Schumacher: “I know what you’re thinking. “Did he win seven Wolrd Championships, or only six?” Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a Mercedes W03, the most powerful racing car in the world, and could blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself one question: “Do I feel lucky?” Well … do ya, punk?

    1. I was really trying to think of something along the lines of Dirty Harry myself :) ! Very nice !

  42. Seeking with every possible means for thousands of a second, wind-tunnel restrictions made the Mercedes drivers experimenting simultaneously different aerodynamic effects of their 2012 nose settings, from the front and from the side.

    1. Harry! Brilliant : )

  43. “Call me Britney one more time… I dare you!”

  44. Schu: “Got pie?”
    Nico: “mmm, pie!”

  45. MSC: “For you, Nico, the title is over”

  46. “I swear … if I catch you letting air out of my tires ONE more time …!

  47. Nico: (Under muttered breath) Oh my god, have you seen the nose on that thing….. try not to look horrified in front of the cameras

    Michael: OH MY *shhhhh* oh my god, has someone crashed it? will it buff out?

  48. Nico: You’re making a television show with that new French loser….and not me??
    Michael: Yes, we’re thinking of calling it LaVergne and Schumi.

  49. Michael: “like my haircut? “

  50. Nico : **** !!!.. yo wife right behind ya..

  51. Michael: Have you seen this under my ear? Ross made me get it installed as part of my Mercedes contract, its a human emotion chip. To be honest its ruined my racecraft.

  52. Michael: Gimmie your lunch money!

  53. Is that your towel on the podium?

    1. Too funny!!!!

    2. Best one in my book! Brilliant!

  54. Nico – “Michael…. from this angle you bear a striking resemblance to the front of a W125… how odd.”

  55. Nico – “Michael, dont look back, but I see Norbert coming this way with his David Hasslehoff CD collection”

  56. I’m not sure I remember you, let me see you from behind.

  57. Schumacher: “Nico…Have you seen my career….I’m sure I left it here somewhere”

    Nico: “Turn Around”

  58. News that David Hasselhoff’s new album didn’t make it to number 1 spread fast within the F1 paddock….

  59. Rosberg proudly wears skirt to new car launch.

  60. NR: No words could ever begin to explain how much I love you.
    MS: What.

  61. Schumacher: “You see that pile of used tiers behind me?”
    Rosberg: “damn, it’s that bad huh?”

  62. Schu: This is my year punk.
    Ros: We will see about that old man.

  63. Or the alternative “caption”

    Schumacher: Hey …nico

    Nico: Hey

    Schumacher: So…….Hows things


    Nico: They are acceptable..for shure

    Schumacher: For Shure

    Nico: For Shure

    Schumacher:……………erm……..(humms a bit)…weather is ….erm…ok today….

    Nico: yes…it is

    Schumacher: Did you find a car parking space this morning……becau….

    Nico: …..Yes I did..

    Schumacher: Oh…becau

    Nico: It was very easy to find one

    Schumacher: oh…..I see…..I could not really find one …so I had to park in a disabled bay…..

    Nico: Oh

    Schumacher: You wont tell Frank will you….

    Nico: I don’t think I will…..

    Schumacher:Great, good, good…if he does ask…just say it was Barrichello

    Nico: For sure

    Schumacher: For sure….superduper…..For shure….

    Nico: For Shure

    Schumacher: For Shure

    Nico: For Shure…..

    Schumacher: So anyway…… I better….erm….get going……

    Nico: For Shure

    Schumacher: For Shure

  64. Nico: Bring it on oldman!!!

  65. now lets never speak of what happened last night again, to anyone, EVER.

  66. MSC: “So.. How many wins was it you had again..?”

  67. Rosberg: I’ve been waiting for you Schu-Mach-Er, we meet again at last. When I left you I was but the learner. Now I am the master (or I will be as long as I can get that elusive win)

  68. MSC: “My records will last a thousand years!”

    NR: “Ja Reich!”

  69. See any spare tires down your end?

  70. Did you see that Comedian on the TV last night he was really funny.

    Yes I liked the one that that began … Hey you with the broken nose.

    Yeh – not quite so funny now is it … No.

  71. Nico: “Are you talking to me?”

  72. Schu – So you’ve got the same machinery, the same choices and the same chances as me have you? we’ll see.

    Nico – Yeh just like they have in the Red Bull team

    Schu – (Mumbles) You got the same as Webber all-right, he’s got the same overalls as Vettle, an you got the same overalls as me!.

  73. NR: How is to get a girl and get married Michael?
    Schu : Win a GP and you’ll find out!
    NR: How is to be a GP’s winner Michael?
    Schu: Get a girl, get married and you’ll find out!

  74. Mark from Toronto
    4th March 2012, 5:12

    You know Norbert promised me all the new parts first….

  75. N: When did you say you are leaving…?
    M: I didn’t.

  76. Nico: “Thats the seventh time you have called me Britney this morning. It isn’t funny anymore.”

  77. Nico : Did you eat my chips?
    Schumacher : You left them on my side of the garage.

  78. Shumi(smiling like a kid): What! Why did Norbert and Ross sit on the front end of the car when they were watching Seinfeld re-runs in the garage? Look at it now!

    Nico(holding back laugh): That’s not funny!

  79. MS: “Fancy going back to Williams Britney, I see they are sponsored by a shampoo company now.”

  80. Slackbladder
    4th March 2012, 8:57

    “Who’s your Daddy…..Punk?”

  81. What do you mean ‘it looks like my wife’..?

    1. Haha I laughed hard at this one!

  82. “Bet you 10 bucks that you blink first.”

  83. (Rosberg) “Why did you sit on my car? Now it looks stupid and ugly because of you!”

  84. Rosberg and Schumacher are just two of the many who are looking for the recently lost Barrichello.

  85. “Don’t look now, but Norbert just arrived in a tutu”
    “OK: let’s try and seem professional. I’ll stare at the car, you think about your career.”

  86. rather than a caption, i’d like to keep them silent and add a backing soundtrack.
    [The good, the bad and ugly theme – basically the classic cowboy showdown one]

  87. Schu: what’s up with the red bull from Mika last night.
    Ros: beats me… And the hand gestures we exchanged….
    Schu: -_-“

  88. NR: My dad could beat up your dad

  89. NR: I’ll miss you when your gone
    MS: Actually, I’ve signed a 2013 deal, no Italian-Scot from Force India will be replacing me soon.
    NR: Oh, what about 2014?
    MS: Same
    NR: (Under breath) Blast..
    MS: Excuse me?
    NR: Oh, nothing, that is brilliant Mick

  90. Schumacher: “You look different without your moustache Keke”

  91. This one is actually a Mercedes advert, it goes…

    Nico: “My lack of wins is killing me”
    Michael: “And I, I must confess, I still believe”
    Both turn to the camera: “Still believe!”

  92. I’m going to beat you this year too Michael. But try to keep your chins up.

  93. 23 minutes and 43 seconds in and it was still stalemate in the annual Mercedes staring competition

  94. Shumacher: You think your better than me, punk.

  95. Msc: I flattened the nose of your car so I would be faster This year!
    Nr: uh huh so why does it say Schumacher on it if its my car?
    Msc: ……….damn!

  96. I usually have a good laugh reading these, but have to say none have made me laugh. Maybe the picture isn’t so good.

  97. Hey Britney, how about letting me by this season, like my old Ferrari teammates had to during the good old day’s.
    Norbert said I don’t have to coz you’re not as fast as you used to be!

  98. Give us a kiss pet!

  99. After a mis-translation regarding the “launch” of the car neither Mercedes driver was willing to volunteer!

  100. Michael ur full of excrement; .. don’t you mean excitement .. you heard what I said.

  101. You said we’d just have to put a brave face on it, so I’m copying you.

  102. Michael : I’m your father!!!

  103. ‘All I am asking for is a bit of respect sonny. After all I was winning races while you were still in nappies and stand to attention when you talk to me’.

    ‘Ja Herr Schumacher, das ich tadellos verstehe und befolgen werde’.

  104. We have a chance of a top podium this year? Do you remember the words to the anthem? Me neither……

  105. Phew !! you dirty old man

  106. Geoff Rogers
    5th March 2012, 13:28

    No… you said you would tell them it looks crap….

  107. What’s all this understeer / oversteer about?
    Err…. I Don’t Know either, is it important?

  108. Nico: (Thinking)…Should i tell Michael he has bird crap on his shoulder? …Nah, just look like you hav’nt seen it!

  109. nico – You’re really funny.

    schumi – What do you mean I’m funny?

  110. NR: i’m guna be in front of you again
    MSC: bring it on!
    NR i wana get my first win
    MSC i wana fight in the front so that i can win a 8th crown

  111. nr: im bored
    msc: i want some food

  112. ronald plain
    11th March 2012, 6:02

    You farted.
    No, it was you.
    No michael, for once you are first.

  113. NR: I think i just pooped in my pants.
    MS: Me too.

  114. jacob.stanton
    28th April 2012, 17:58

    HEY Schumacher who is going to be in front because you look awful and I’m not improving on in china so it could go either way so its going to be exiting isn’t it.

  115. MS:I’m having a prediction.
    NR: What?
    MS:This horrible car will win you the chinese GP

  116. So your telling me Shizer is a german drink and you were offering me a large one?

Comments are closed.