Felipe Massa, Fernando Alonso, Ferrari, Sepang, 2012

Caption Competition 12: Ferrari team mates

Caption Competition

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Felipe Massa, Fernando Alonso, Ferrari, Sepang, 2012

This week’s Caption Competition involves the two Ferrari drivers.

Here’s Fernando Alonso showing Felipe Massa something on his phone during the Malaysian Grand Prix weekend.

What’s going on here? It’s over to you to supply the funniest caption.

A selection of the best will be featured in the daily round-up.

Caption Competition

Browse all previous Caption Competitions

Image ?? Ferrari spa/Ercole Colombo

Author information

Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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  • 153 comments on “Caption Competition 12: Ferrari team mates”

    1. Stephen Higgins
      28th April 2012, 10:05

      “Look very closely Filipe, I can make my thumb dissappear !!”

    2. Hey, Felipe, wanna see the betting odds of you winning the championship?

      (HINT: 1000/1 as opposed to Alonso’s 16/1.)

    3. “See, I am faster than you”

      Pathetic, I know, but I suck at these things.

    4. see I told you I beat angry birds

    5. And this is where I jammed a potato up Lewis’s exhaust pipe!

    6. Massa : Your’e kidding, Nico actually sang Baby one more time after winning in China?
      Alonso : Yes, It went viral today. Look 2 million hits on youtube !

      1. China was three weeks after Malaysia, so as good as this might be it wouldn’t be accurate.

        1. Lol .. I missed the existing caption :) !

    7. Mas: NO WAY!!

      Alo: I’m telling you.. That IS Tulisa out of N-Dubz!

      1. Check this out, this is Schumacher’s worst ever season to date!

      2. @nemo87 Bonus point for being topical!

    8. You see Felipe, I am not only faster than you but I also have more followers!

    9. Alonso – “Look at that score in Angry Birds!!!”
      Massa – “It looks ok…I think I might be able to beat that”

      Stefano calls on the same phone-

      “Felipe, fernando is better than you”

      1. the best comment by far

      2. Brilliant!! Though it should be Rob :p

    10. 1. Alonso: “Here, I took a photo of my six tenths.”

      2. Alonso: “See, I have more Facebook friends than you!”

      3. Alonso: “So I borrowed your phone earlier and sent this to your wife.”

    11. (Seeing as it was before the Malaysian Grand Prix)
      “Yes Felipe, that is Charles Pic ahead of you in the standings… no, it’s not a joke!”

      1. lol, that’s a good one!

    12. Alonso: I took this one last night when I went out and saw Kimi at the bar.
      Massa: Is that a Ferrari lampshade around his waist?

    13. A: Hey Fellipe…this is the top secret fetzer damper that makes my car faster than yours!

    14. Fernando: Hey Felipe, check this out…….
      Felipe: Whats that?…..
      Fernando: Its Checo signing the Ferrari contract……do you think i should post it on twitter or give it to Autosport??

    15. Is this your wife, Felipe?

      (tasteless I know but that’s all I could come up with :D)

    16. Look Felipe it’s a text from Luca
      Apparently I’m faster than you

      1. Nice try!

    17. Alonso: Look, they are going viral about Bahrain stuff… we need a lot more protection when we go to Brazil.

      Massa: Don’t say that in public, Nando. Barrichello will probably cry.

    18. Alonso: “Bernie might be able to force us to come to Bahrain agaisnt out will, but I’m beating him in Words With Friends.”

    19. ‘See Felipe, more people support me on F1Fanatic than you!’

    20. “Look, LDM just fired you.”

    21. Alonso: “Look at what I found on F1 Fanatic this morning!”

      1. Help, I’m stuck in a loop.

      2. Brilliant!

    22. Alonso: “And here is Nick Heidfeld’s Bee Gees tribute band.”

    23. Hey! Felipe, isn’t that Pedro, on his knees praying to the statue of Enzo??? Or is it you?

    24. Felipe: Why is this guy naked and what’s the jar for?
      Fern.: Hah, just wait for it dude!

      1. That’s just plain wrong :P

    25. Fernando – “And that’s me taking a win, while you stuggled and finished outside the points.”

      Felipe – “Thats ok… but it’s not going to happen anytime again”

    26. Alternatively:

      Felipe: One man one what?? I don’t see a jar anywhere…
      Fern.: Hrahrahrahra!

    27. Fernando: ‘So it seems to me that Brazilians are quite good at making me happy in ALL sorts of ways.’

    28. Fernando: “And this is me and Stef at the Wrooom festival”
      Felipe: “Why are you wearing that massive wig?”

    29. You see, Felipe. Lotus also tells a driver the other is faster than him.

    30. Felipe: “Nooooooooo! Them triple spikes! Gets me every time!”
      Fernando: “That’s why it’s called the impossible game.”

    31. Fernando: I have got the winning strategy for “us” to win.
      Massa: Really? What’s that?
      Fernando: You have got the simplest job, man. Stop every car coming behind you and when you see a red car you let it pass. In addition, if you don’t see the red car coming, don’t worry, someone will say on the radio “Fernando is faster than you”. Simples.

    32. Fernando: Look at today’s round-up “Kimi is faster than you”! Funny!
      Felipe: Tsk – whatever man – that line’s been done to death.

    33. matthewf1 (@)
      28th April 2012, 11:33

      Hey, look at this Felipe, even Tomita is faster than you!

      1. haha!!! now thats one good caption :D

    34. “Fernando shows Felipe his most recent texts from Stefano, about Felipe…and his contract!”

    35. “I told you Felipe, it’s Q3 and my hopeless Live Timing still doesn’t work”

    36. Alonso: “Want to see a funny joke?”
      Massa: “Sure”
      Text: “Knock knock”,
      “Who’s there?”
      “Alonso who?”
      “Alonso is faster than you.”

    37. matthewf1 (@)
      28th April 2012, 11:43

      Ok Felipe, when I am in Q3 later, this is where you can follow the live timing :)

        1. Or you might want to share with Lao (from the 2012 Chinese GP F1 Forum on BBC)

    38. I’ve got porn.

    39. Fernando happily showing Felipe the odds of him making it to Monaco, hence Felipe’s sad face.

    40. Fernando shows Felipe the fotage of Q3 this year, only to Felipe’s confussion when he does not see himself.

    41. #BernieTheKing ‘tell Felipe my 18yo gf can drive fster @Fernando#1@Marenello

    42. Look, I found Kimi’s remote control!

    43. Biskit Boy (@sean-p-newmanlive-co-uk)
      28th April 2012, 12:07

      This angry bird looks just like bernie

    44. Biskit Boy (@sean-p-newmanlive-co-uk)
      28th April 2012, 12:12

      And if you press your sunglasses on it and I hold by thumb up like this I can finally get four bars of reception!

    45. Fernando: Haha, look at this.
      Felipe: What is it?
      Fernando: Some English blogger called Keith Collantine making fun of Michael Schumacher’s rant about the Pirelli tyres.

    46. ‘Look, this is how champagne bottles look like today.’

    47. Alonso: ‘This is what the WDC trophy looks like.’

    48. Felipe: “HRT are really racing THAT?!?”

    49. See? I told you! Bernie is shorter than a six-year old!

    50. And this, Fillipe, is how you use Kangaroo TV – for later in the season, you know.

    51. ALO: and this is all that’s left of a rear Pirelli after 12 laps.
      MAS: unbelievable! It fits in the palm of your hand.

    52. Alonso: “Look what I found in an e-mail from Seb to Lewis!”

      Vettel: “Dontcha wish your car was designed by Adrian Newey?
      Dontcha wish you could finish higher than P3?
      Dontcha? Oh, Lewis, Lewis, dontcha?
      Dontcha wish your pit crew could get the job done right?
      Dontcha wish they could get that tyre on tight?
      Dontcha? Oh, Lewis, Lewis, dontcha?
      Dontcha wish it was someone else passing ’round the outside?
      Dontcha wish you could go another lap before your tyres died?
      Dontcha? Oh, Lewis, Lewis, dontcha?
      Dontcha wish you were smoother than Sean Connery?
      Dontcha wish you were chasing World Title number three?
      Dontcha? Oh, Lewis, Lewis, dontcha?”

      1. I can imagine that would be something that Vettel would say, he is Vettel..

      2. this is epic. . :D

      3. That’s actually pretty funny. Way too long to win the caption contest though :P

    53. MAS: …she’s from the Ukraine, blonde, works as a doctor, and plays the piano. Go on, press “chat” She perfect for you dude.

    54. Felipe:- “Is that what Checo will look like in Ferrari clothing, **** he looks sick!”

    55. Alonson: Look Felipe.. Honestly, this is the first time in F1F Caption Competition that all entry so far (4 pages) are not funny at all…

    56. Look! They’re making fun of us on the caption competition!

    57. Felipe: “Did you just photoshop yourself on the top of the podium?”
      Fernando: “…That’s not photoshop”

      1. winner surely

      2. awesome man, just awesome, losers that is ferrari

    58. Massa and Alonso have a laugh as Luca sends them a picture of the 2012 Ferrari.

      Unfortunately it wasn’t a joke.

    59. Alonso: “Watch and learn how to win in uncompetetive car!”

    60. Alonso: Here is that message from that fortune teller. He says I’m going to win in Malaysia!
      Massa: Hilarious! These people are from another planet…

    61. Massa: Check this out!
      Fernando: Nice t*ts!

    62. ALO: Check out these F1 predictions, some nutter thinks I’m going to win and Checo will be second!!!

    63. FA: “Hey Felipe, look! Ive got a higher score then you on ‘Angry Birds’! hehe”

    64. Alonso ‘let me just scroll down to the bottom of the table…’

    65. FA: Felipe, can you read this satnav? Otherwise we cant find the paddock…
      FM: Ahh forsure, ….. there we are. I think

    66. And then I said to her…… I love you, too.

    67. *May be inappropriate, but anyway:

      Massa: “Two girls and one cup? What’s the matter with that?”

    68. ioannislalakidis
      28th April 2012, 16:14

      Fernando: Here is my knew girlfriend….incredible
      Massa: Aaaa…is that the trophy for being 1 sec quicker?…what the heck, she don’t deserve it!!!!

    69. Alonso: ‘Look, my new b****….. i mean teammate, his name is Sergio’

    70. SuperJ (@thesuperjesus)
      28th April 2012, 16:25

      Felipe, check out my new app. It counts down the amount of time you have left to drive for Ferrari.

    71. Jacob Stanton
      28th April 2012, 16:29

      HEY! Felipe look how much faster my car is than your car

    72. “Look at a video replay of McLaren’s pit stops!”

    73. You see, I use @Prisoner Monkeys as my alias to stirr up all those fanatics!

    74. “Luca texted me asking if I’d prefer Badoer or Fisichella in the #2 car -which do you think?”

    75. Fernando: Hey Felipe, apparently they’re not sacking you till the end of the year!
      Felipe: And what are you so happy about?
      Fernando: *smirk* Cause I’m faster than you.

    76. check this out felipe… lewis girlfriend and me have
      something in common…… we both brazilians in close support

    77. Jacob Stanton
      28th April 2012, 17:39

      HEY! Felipe lets see the standings between you and me the man in front will win 6000£ Felipe hey do you want me to be mr bean because you would not want me to because you HATE! me when I am.

    78. henry.stanton
      28th April 2012, 17:46

      Hey Felipe, have you seen my bank balance.

      Felipe, “Is that in dollars or lira”

    79. Massa : So you think, The Secret is going to help me get my groove back Felipe ?

    80. Felipe, look! I breaded my cat!

    81. Alonso: “Take a look Felipe: This is Twitter, the only place where that’s me following you.”

    82. Hey Felipe, Look at Sebastian’s new hair do :)

    83. dodge5847 (@)
      28th April 2012, 18:37

      look Felipe, Hamilton left himself logged onto facebook so I fraped him!

    84. Look Felipe. Some nurk on Facebook reckons you’ll get your contract renewed.

    85. Only one cup… that’s mental…

    86. Jacob Stanton
      28th April 2012, 19:53

      hey did you see the times because you would not be happy because my car was much better than yours was

      ye so I did try my best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    87. “-Hey Felipe, i took a picture of a podium for you to see how it’s like to be up there.”

    88. Fellipe: “No seriously man! Listen to me – I am telling you; it was Hamilton who told Rosberg to do it! He’s behind everything!”

      Bahrain – Rosberg got confused and pushed his mate Hamilton on the first attempt but got it nearly right the second time… ;-)

    89. “Check it out Felipe, Luca bobble heads on eBay!”

    90. “Now that’s what I call a Brazillian”

      1. @hohum Good effort!

    91. Imagine finding that in your laundry basket.

    92. Fernando: Look what I did last night
      Felipe : in the car?

    93. DK (@seijakessen)
      29th April 2012, 2:19

      Fernando: Hey look at all these stories saying you’re going to be replaced before the season is over Felipe!
      Felipe: WHART!?!?

    94. ‘ see look its gonna be a dry race, thats why everyone is going with a dry setup…’

    95. Fernando: Felipe, check is out felipe, my phone yea, turns into a calculator.

    96. Fernando: The one with the whip is Bernie.
      Felipe: Wow!

    97. FA : so this is a picture of what they call a podium, and that’s parc femme where the top three cars park, and they give u champagne after the race

      FM: what? and they have this ‘podium’ at EVERY race???

    98. Felipe don’t look they’re taking pictures. Let’s pretend to be good buddies!

    99. I’m really sorry, Felipe, but I can even text faster than you.

    100. ‘look Felipe I got a load of points on wordfued with ‘looser’ tw and dw points’

      ‘I showed you a looser can score points in last race’

    101. Jacob Stanton
      29th April 2012, 10:34

      “HEY! Felipe after malaysia I have won 1000000000000000000000000000£”

      Felipe”is it italian because if it is I want to your credit card.”

    102. Jacob Stanton
      29th April 2012, 10:40

      hey I’v took a photo of me on the podium and every one shouting my name while you were walking past in an grumpy way to the pit.

    103. Alonso: Check it out, snapped a pic of Jenson’s misses looking bang tidy!

    104. Nando: Yeah this new App tests Reaction times.
      Massa: Let me try that!
      Nanda: Oh!
      Massa: What:
      Nando: App says are you asleep!

    105. “Yo, Felipe, check it out – I’ve got all McLaren’s secret documents on this here smart phone! So much more convenient.”

    106. FER-nando FER-rari
      29th April 2012, 13:34

      “…And this is exactly how I got Piquet Jr to crash and allow me to snatch victory from you. See! Ferrari’s not the place I first started screwing your happiness!!! Now wipe that smile off your face!”

    107. Alonso: Hey, look at this I can afford to watch the entire race live on my mobile with Sky Go.
      Massa: Incredible, its at times like this I wonder what the poor people are doing.
      Alonso: Well, in 5 hours they will be watching race highlights on the beeb.
      Massa: Heh, heh.
      Bernie: Mwhaaaaa haaaa haaa haaaaa

    108. Alo: Check this pic out – I photoshopped Hamilton into an HRT!

    109. ‘even spring rolls…’

      context : http://foodonmydog.com/

    110. Felipe: Is that a warning message from Hamilton?! Oh no!!!
      Fernando: Oh yes… But this year you should be the the one who knocks him out of the races.

    111. Felipe: “Fernando – can you help me with this Draw Something game?”

        1. brilliant.

    112. Fernando : HaHa !Look at your points you’ll never be world champion !

    113. Fernando:I’m the faster driver so you should always be behind me.NO MATTER WHAT !
      massa:You gonna make me cry.STOP THAT!

      Fernando:I wish lewis were here to see this

    114. “I’m telling you Felipe, they are real and they really are that big”.

    115. Massa: “Wow, I was wondering what the front of your car looked like, I’ve only seen it from behind!”

    116. Biskit Boy (@sean-p-newmanlive-co-uk)
      29th April 2012, 20:51

      Felipe: Wow what a babe! Who is it?
      Alonso: It’s Bernie’s new mother in law!!

    117. “Look closely, Felipe, it’s called a podium.”

    118. Alonso: It’s mine but i can share it just a little bit.

    119. Felipe: Oh no!!! Is that a warning message from Hamilton??!!
      Fernando: Oh yes, but this year try to be the one who knocks him out of the races.

    120. stacey mccoig
      30th April 2012, 14:42

      What F1 drivers do when bored..- “Look I painted Hamiltons wing mirrors red! “

    121. Alonso ” Felipe… see what Stefano is up to in this picture with Max Moseley? It could help your contract next year”

    122. Alonso: Hey Felipe, check this video out, your wife proved I’m quicker than you..

    123. Hey Felipe have a look at this. Stefano says, I can drive both cars next season.

    124. Chris (@limitedslip)
      19th May 2012, 21:51

      Look, I Photoshoped you into a HRT.

    125. And this is Raquel in more cosplay costumes…

    126. Alonso showing Massa a pic of Hamilton and Nicole:

      Massa : That sure is small!!!

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