Daniil Kvyat, Red Bull, Red Bull Ring, 2015

Caption Competition 81: Daniil Kvyat

Caption Competition

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Daniil Kvyat, Red Bull, Red Bull Ring, 2015

Life-sized cut-outs of the drivers are rearranged at the Austrian Grand Prix.

Can you come up with a funny caption for this picture? Post your suggestion in the comments below.

A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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  • 134 comments on “Caption Competition 81: Daniil Kvyat”

    1. Kvyat Russian to his spot.

    2. “The media and PR commitments have over-sanitised Formula 1; drivers’ personalities are far too wooden these days.”

      1. …Brilliant.

    3. Lotus-grosjean
      1st August 2015, 11:53

      Daniil Kvyat will be starting in the pit lane for being out of position on the grid.

      1. ColdFly F1 (@)
        1st August 2015, 12:14

        funny

    4. Daniil Kvyat: A cut above the rest.

    5. Even in cardboard form, Daniel can’t help but smile at the flying Kvyat…

    6. This one seems much heavier than Ricciardo,,,

    7. It’s summer break Daniil, back to the closet.

    8. Finally! I’ll just make an all Daniil front row.

    9. Where’s wally?

      1. The 5th guy on the left.

    10. Here is a radical new idea to reduce driver weight in the car so that the car goes faster.

    11. ColdFly F1 (@)
      1st August 2015, 12:13

      According to Russian law we can’t put him next to another guy!

      1. Hahahaha I won’t even bother, that’s hilarious

      2. Check mate! Winner!

      3. Can see Western propaganda has worked its magic on you nicely :)

    12. just making it clear I have finished ahead of Ricciardo more this year

    13. Concerns began to be expressed after it became evident how extreme driver weight loss programmes have become under the new regulations.

      1. Lol. Good one.

    14. So lets take this Kvyatt guy out of the way

    15. Some say the driver weight restrictions have gone too far….

    16. While other drivers had their backs to the walls, Kyvat stood tall to finish 2nd in Hungry.

      1. hungary*

    17. Put it down Dr Marko…
      No, you can’t take him home!

    18. Kvyat’s engineer thinks this is a better position than Daniil deserves.

    19. Daniil’s Hungarian Grand Prix race rehearsal… Coming thru as others fall on side of road

    20. Hmmm, thought Red Bull gives you wings ?

    21. LOOK OUT DANIIL, Maldonado is behind you.. !!

    22. Do not hold Ricciardo behind. Do not hold Ricciardo, Danny, please. Do not hold Ricciardo. Copy? Let Ricciardo through please Danny. Danny please let Ricciardo through. Do not hold him up, let him through now please, now. NOW!

    23. He seems a bit quiet.

    24. Somehow, the hall of fame seems like a cost cut version this year.

    25. Once more Red Bull pit wall decides to get Kvyat out of the way.

    26. The door was locked and I swear they’ve changed positions since last night

    27. Who’s that Daniil Flat?

    28. Red Bull driver cut out excluded after failing FIA deflection test.

      1. OR: Red Bull driver cut out after failing FIA deflection test.

    29. Following widespread criticism, Bernie decides to replace The Hall of Clapping Women with something slightly less creepy.

    30. Well that explains why the drivers lack personalities…

    31. Put him next tot the iceman that will keep him cool!

    32. A disguised Daniil is caught trying to move his cut out “up the grid” in the hallway.

    33. Keith: Mr. Ecclestone is it true the proposed 2017 cars will only accommodate 2D drivers?
      BE: Yes. Rolex owners also own 3D TVs.

    34. AMR (@aiera-music)
      1st August 2015, 13:56

      Keeping in the trend of gimmicks involving the cars, F1 drivers are also becoming artificial.

    35. Kvyat doesn’t like being pushed around, but he couldn’t control himself after getting airborne.

    36. Unaccustomed to the podium, Kvyat leaves right after the race. Life-sized cut-out rushed up to accept the trophy on his behalf. Crowd just assumes in order to come 2nd he must have run the whole race flat.

    37. Ok, now everyone is as talkative as Kimi.

    38. Bernie puts the finishing touches to his latest F1 ripoff scheme… An evening with the drivers, £1000 a ticket.

    39. Left side is for drivers who will run the same team next year…
      Yes, I know you beat your teammate in Hungary Danny..
      Nevertheless It’s not your position because of RED BULL’s choice!

      1. ~~~How about MASSA?

    40. Horner – “Please move Kvyat behind Ricciardo!”

    41. Just another one for fun –

      Great turnout for Bernie’s birthday bash!

    42. Daniil demonstrating how important it is to have fans lift you up.

    43. flat out, Kvyat rises above his teammate in during the Hungarian GP.

    44. “just move Daniil over there so Ricciardo can get through”

    45. Bernie requires all drivers to be 2 dimensional

    46. Nick (@theawesomefish)
      1st August 2015, 15:43

      In another misguided effort to curb costs, the FIA unveil what will replace the CGI race grid.

    47. For the last time, Romain, I didn’t steal your helmet!

    48. Low profile tyres are replaced with low profile drivers in the new rules for 2017.

    49. Marko: WHO IS HOLDING up Kvyat??

    50. Daniil Kvyat is held up as a template for future F1 drivers.

    51. It was a flying run for the Russian that day.

    52. Sorry, I was just laying new asphalt with my steamroller, didn’t see the drivers. But I think I’ve picked up all of them now. I’m sure they will recover soon.

    53. “I’m better off out of F1”, says Adrian Sutil. “It’s ridiculous how much weight the drivers have to lose now!”

    54. I swear … some of these guys are just so two-dimensional!

    55. Webber, disguised as Kvyat, is still trying his luck in F1.

    56. Putin wants this spot.

    57. Upon hearing the drivers discontent with F1’s new rules package, the FIA gears up for its new “Driver representatives” program.

    58. Silly season begins, and Kvyat’s cutout thinks, “Come on Merc or Ferrari engine! Please not a McHonda, please not a McHonda!”

    59. “Proposals made for the replacement of grid girls.”

    60. Kimi Raikkonen is not impressed…
      Felipe Massa is.

    61. Evidence emerges drivers are being bored stiff by the current formula

    62. Dr.Marko:
      “Sorry Daniil, you are just not cut out for the job”

    63. FIA found a perfect replacement for grid girls.

    64. Kvyat couldn’t handle the “press”.

    65. Looks like the engineers are succeeding in removing the unwanted human element from driving the cars. I doubt the spectators will notice.

    66. Still got more personality than Nigel Mansell.

    67. Let’s put him behind Ricciardo.

    68. Watch this: I put him behind Ricciardo, he pops up in front of him.

      1. Ha ha I like this.

    69. Hogan’s Alley reborn: F1 edition.

    70. Hopeful of opening his own museum like Fernando one day Daniil Kvyat starts collecting memorabilia.

    71. Crap, this Kvyat’s cut-outs covers my face..

    72. I told you I was, for sure, taller than Felipe.

    73. In an attempt to get around the new Start Regulations, Red Bull had returned to the traditional pedal operated clutch, and had surgically attached a two extra feet to Daniil Kvyat to operate it. However, following constant ridicule from fellow driver Daniel Ricciardo, who said it was ridiculous that an F1 driver needed extra feet to drive a car. In addition, there were protests from Felipe Massa and Kimi Raikkonen regarding breaches to the F1 Safety Regulations regarding getting safely out of a car following a crash. Red Bull have announced the feet will be removed.

    74. “Finally old enough to join ‘the big time’ – the cardboard cut-outs!”

    75. I think I’ll just move my cutout to the front thank-you very much!

    76. Where should I put him? To the back? Or all the way to the back?

    77. You must be this tall to drive a formula one car.

    78. After the events leading up to the Hungarian GP, all the drivers were left feeling a little flat, and Daniil was particularly moved.

      1. I know the competition is over, but this made me laugh.

    79. I think someone said something similar earlier but:

      A flying Kvyat finally proves Red Bull really does give you wings…

    80. Fanboost, F1 style

    81. These are the guys that can drive flat out.

    82. These guy is me.

    83. Shhh, be Kvyat. And do not get carried away.

    84. After a first podium and his nations best ever result, Red Bull had trouble keeping their young Russian driver’s feet on the ground

    85. When I said to ‘drive flat out’, that wasn’t quite what I had in mind!

    86. Not a caption, but the guy on the right by the oversized cut-out of Massa looks a lot like Ricciardo

    87. Kvyat makes his way onto the dummy grid.

    88. Multimedia as Bernie sees it

    89. Todays F1 drivers are too one-dimensional and the current F1 season is a bit flat to be honest

    90. years from now they’re going to ask us, “where were you when they took over the planet?”, I’m just gonna say ‘ we just stood by and watched!’

    91. Preparing for Bernie’s birthday. Everyone will be there..

    92. Right now life is a bit doll

    93. In his old age, this is the only way Bernie can memorize all the drivers names.

    94. you said you wanted the drivers to be “flat out!” , Bernie listened!

      1. Drivers are flat out!

    95. Kvyat: “where is my vodka?”
      Raikkonen: “that’s right, we need to drink.”
      Massa: “no drinking! Safety first.”

    96. Spotted upside down in a bin behind the pit building: the Da Costa cutout.

    97. They say modern Formula One drivers are too 2 dimensional…

    98. Red Bull gives you that little ‘extra lift’

    99. After a Kvyat successful race, Putin demands Red Bull changes it’s name to just “Red”. He seems to speak for deaf ears though.

    100. ‘Board’ with the usual line up ?- think some drivers may not be ‘cut out’ to be champions? you are mistaken here Kvyat proves that in this pole position he could even win the ‘Red Bull Air Race’ !!

    101. Pat Ruadh (@fullcoursecaution)
      2nd August 2015, 16:50

      Guilleme Roquelin: “why the hold up Dani? Everyone else is flat”

    102. Pat Ruadh (@fullcoursecaution)
      2nd August 2015, 17:02

      In a bid to avoid any more PR disasters, the strategy group agrees on completely 2-dimensional drivers for 2016.

    103. Pat Ruadh (@fullcoursecaution)
      2nd August 2015, 17:10

      Mateschitz: “yes take it away and bring in the Verstappen one.”

    104. Jump start, you’re doing it wrong.

    105. F1 is going too far with weight limits.

    106. …that moment when you realise Bernie’s show is really a bunch of puppets and cardboard stand-ins

    107. So remember: coast and lift. Got it?

    108. “…And after that round, Daniil, gets to Go to the Head of the Class”

    109. Put him in line with the other second divers, like Massa and Kimi.

    110. Payday at the F1 office. Everyone stands patiently in line for their paycheck.

    111. Danil issues a challenge to Kimi to win the coveted ‘most convincing cardboard cutout face’ title.

    112. Kvyat is so lightweight, he can levitate while others are grounded…

    113. Daniil Levitate Kvyat

    114. bernie ecclestone’s right the drivers do have wooden personalities

    115. After his first ever F1 podium, Kvyat struggles to keep his feet on the ground.

    116. Alonso. If I hide behind here for a bit perhaps Ron will find someone else to drive that bloody McLaren !!.

    117. Ok the guy behind the board is like: dancing with stars…….and the crowd is like: daaaaaaa neeeeee whaaataaatttt!!!!

    Comments are closed.