Sebastian Vettel has had plenty to reflect on in his second season with Ferrari so far. So what’s he been scribbling?
That’s for you to decide in this weekend’s Caption Competition. Add the funniest idea for a caption you can come up with in the comments below.
A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.
Caption Competition
- Caption Competition 209: Sole searching
- Caption Competition 208: Sitting around
- Caption Competition 207: Rear view
- Caption Competition 206: Didn’t he doodle well
- Caption Competition 205: Meet the new boss
Browse all Caption Competitions
Michael Filletti
4th June 2016, 11:58
“Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz?”
Tommy Scragend
4th June 2016, 21:43
This.
bogaaaa (@nosehair)
6th June 2016, 12:41
So honorable board members all the above reasons are why l feel am qualified for the CEO position.
Dan_the_McLaren_fan (@dan_the_mclaren_fan)
4th June 2016, 12:01
“Dear Santa Claus…”
Robbie (@robbie)
4th June 2016, 12:23
Lol, before I looked at any responses I thought…Dear Santa.
dex022 (@dex022)
4th June 2016, 12:04
Since nobody can design proper chassis almost a decade i have to do it now…
Retired (@jeff1s)
4th June 2016, 12:05
Birthday wishes list: …
Strontium (@strontium)
4th June 2016, 18:53
Somebody else’s car
Max Jacobson (@vettel1)
4th June 2016, 12:05
After having his session prematurely brought to a close, Sebastian took to drawing funny moustaches on Marchionne to pass the time.
Rocky (@rocky)
4th June 2016, 12:09
I won’t swear on the radio
I won’t swear on the radio
I won’t swear on the radio
KhanistanF1 (@khanistanf1)
4th June 2016, 14:15
XD classic
Gabriel (@naylamp)
4th June 2016, 19:09
Good one. It bring me memories of my childhood.
Richard (@rick1984)
5th June 2016, 2:54
Thats what i was going to say!!!
robin vh
5th June 2016, 8:02
+1
timtoo (@timtoo)
4th June 2016, 12:10
Sebastian Vettel spotted rehearsing his crybaby lines for the upcoming Canadian GP
Sviatoslav (@)
4th June 2016, 12:10
“Ferrari can win again. Ferrari can win again. Ferrari can win again…”. I’ll write this 100 times to make it happen.
the_sigman (@sigman1998)
4th June 2016, 12:10
Dear Daniil, …
just.daz (@nemo87)
4th June 2016, 12:11
Dear Marko..
Please.
ColdFly F1 (@)
4th June 2016, 12:18
you beat me to it.
Eggry (@eggry)
4th June 2016, 12:11
Dear Santa, I want The one the others have.
Niall Geoghegan (@ncwg)
4th June 2016, 12:15
As he was told to stop complaining on Team Radio, Vettel chooses to express himself in strongly worded letters.
Simon
4th June 2016, 12:16
Dear Fernando,
I’ve followed most of your advice. I just can’t recall what to do after 5 months of dysfunctional engineering meetings in a row.
Was it:
A) Yell over the radio… again
or
B) Sign with McLaren
———-
Dear Gerhard
I’ve followed most of your advice. I just can’t recall what to do after 5 months of dysfunctional engineering meetings in a row.
Was it:
A) Yell over the radio… again
or
B) Sign with McLaren or Benetton?
———-
Dear Alain and Nigel
I’ve followed most of your advice. I just can’t recall what to do after 5 months of dysfunctional engineering meetings in a row.
Was it:
A) Yell over the radio… again
or
B) Sign with Williams
Dear Kimi
I’ve followed most of your advice. I just can’t recall what to do after 5 months of dysfunctional engineering meetings in a row.
Was it:
A) Yell over the radio… again
or
B) Go to WRC
Dear Mr Alesi
I’ve followed most of your advice. I just can’t recall what to do after 5 months of dysfunctional engineering meetings in a row.
Was it:
A) Yell over the radio… again
or
B) Sign with Benetton
Dear Mr Newey
Please Please Please. Stop being a cucumber. I’m begging you. We’ll double the previous offer.
NewVerstappenFan (@jureo)
4th June 2016, 14:49
Nice joke, ripe with truth and Ferrari fail history.
Trident
7th June 2016, 11:09
Fantastic. This is the only one I laughed at really hard. So true.
Lee Porcelli
4th June 2016, 12:24
Dear Mr Horner,
Thanks for listening to me in Russia.Its only early but I have Max at a minus three at this stage. Speak later.
P’s every all right for season 2018.
Love Seb.
Jamie (@jdpkart18)
4th June 2016, 12:25
Dear Diary, Ferrari want me to win this year but I haven’t won yet. What did I do to not deserve a win so far this year? Also, that 18 year old kid took my record off of me in Spain. Please make sure he doesn’t come to Ferrari. Thanks Diary.
Zim
4th June 2016, 12:26
“Where do I start…?”
Aidan
4th June 2016, 12:26
Excuse list for Sergio, item 1 …
Jamie (@jdpkart18)
4th June 2016, 12:28
In theory, we can win this year. In practice so far this year, we can’t win.
Wessel (@wessel-v1)
4th June 2016, 12:28
“Seriously, what are we doing? Racing, or …? Hmm…”
Gimbles
4th June 2016, 12:29
Dear diary,
Kimi looked so cute with his new sunglasses today. Why won’t he just notice me?
ColdFly F1 (@)
4th June 2016, 12:34
Vettel fills in the employee satisfaction questionnaire. (latest tool implemented to build team spirit)
Michael (@freelittlebirds)
4th June 2016, 13:04
+1
Daz
4th June 2016, 12:34
Ferrari’s are red,
Red Bulls are blue,
At least I don’t,
have your pit crew.
KhanistanF1 (@khanistanf1)
4th June 2016, 16:54
so beautifully funny
Ostrailya
4th June 2016, 18:58
Brilliant!
cms
4th June 2016, 21:02
+1
Neil (@neilosjames)
4th June 2016, 12:37
Sebastian found a more everyday use for his underemployed finger.
Bobby (@f1bobby)
4th June 2016, 13:27
Haha, I like it. We haven’t seen ‘the finger’ for a while now.
Jonathan (@jonny705)
4th June 2016, 12:52
With 15 races still to go, Sebastian could hardly contain his excitement at the thought of a new helmet design.
QuadQuantum
4th June 2016, 17:31
This wins!
Biggsy
4th June 2016, 13:06
Maybe if I just add this performance clause while no one is watching…
black (@black)
4th June 2016, 13:23
Dear Mr Horner
It’s been a long time since we spoke. I see you seem somehow more flexible these days, regarding who drives your car every new race. Give me a call sometime, maybe we can work something out…
Yours, 4-time-WDC
CarWars (@maxv)
4th June 2016, 19:30
And to add to that: maybe you can put me in the car in Canada and demote max to Ferrari?
Jaime
4th June 2016, 13:25
sebastian is trying to design a new color scheme that won’t attract any more angry charging (red)bulls.
Liz
4th June 2016, 13:29
Dear Maurizio,
I found this on the Internet:
“Secret Rocket Fuel”
6H (aq)+2MnO4+5H2O2(f) -> 2Mn2(aq)+5O2 (g)+8H2O(f)
Maybe this will help us get past those damn Mercedes.
Sincerely,
Seb
babis1980 (@babis1980)
4th June 2016, 13:30
what to buy from the market:
milk, chips, cheese, spaggetti, energy drink (not red bull at least for three years)
Mark Thomson (@melthom)
4th June 2016, 13:32
I will never use an iPad
I will never use Facebook
I will never use a blogg
I will never use a computer
cdavman (@cdavman)
4th June 2016, 13:33
Dear Agony Aunt,
I split with my previous partner who I’d had many good years with, for a scarlet woman, who told me she’d settle down with me and promised me so much more. After 2 years, things aren’t what I expected and now I’m seeing my previous love with a much younger guy, I find myself lusting after her again…
What shall I do?
Janet54321
4th June 2016, 13:56
Good one.
Jeroen Bons
4th June 2016, 14:14
Very nice!
lubhz (@lubhz)
6th June 2016, 12:58
:-) :-)
Peppermint-Lemon (@)
4th June 2016, 13:35
Seb writes letter to the FIA to thank them for the ban on team radio, saves having to add more money to the swear jar at home.
Cliffery (@cliffery)
4th June 2016, 13:37
Seb copies the exit clause from Fernando’s old contract…
Jason (@jmwalley)
4th June 2016, 15:43
+1
Sun Siyuan (@peking901)
5th June 2016, 10:06
good one！lol
rehaan
6th June 2016, 10:27
Roflmax!
Ant
4th June 2016, 13:59
Dear Mercedes…
Vettel1
4th June 2016, 14:00
Vettel filling in his resignation form.
Uzair Syed (@ultimateuzair)
4th June 2016, 14:02
”Helmut, swap them back!”
greg-c (@greg-c)
4th June 2016, 14:06
Hello Mudda
Hello Fudda
Lance (@proapplez)
4th June 2016, 14:08
This is ridiculous…
First you guys robbed me of the win in Australia with that strategy…
Then HE CAME AT ME LIKE A TORPEDO
In Bahrain my engine quit
Then the torpedo struck.. Again
In Spain the 18 year old won when we should have, what are we doing here? Racing or ping pong?
In Monaco we werent quick enough..
Red bull, do you want me back?
Todfod (@todfod)
4th June 2016, 14:11
Dear Christian, I’m sorry I left. Please help me!
Jeroen Bons
4th June 2016, 14:12
Dear Santa please give me a Mercedes with red paint all over it.
and
Make sure that Kimi tells me a good joke at every start of a GP
and
Make sure that I can tell him one at the finnish.
and
Give all my competitors a book which they cant stop reading.
and
do you really love me?
OmarRoncal - Go Seb!!! (@)
4th June 2016, 14:14
“Loser Lucy”, “Breaking Becky”, “F*ing Ferrari”,
Michal (@mewho)
4th June 2016, 19:54
nice one! :D
Will Wood (@willwood)
4th June 2016, 14:16
The FIA’s radical new team radio regulations now force drivers to communicate with their race engineer solely through second-class post.
ColdFly F1 (@)
4th June 2016, 16:53
good one @willwood
Mashiat (@mashiat)
4th June 2016, 14:27
Dear Mr. Ecclestone,
2017. Mercedes. Make it happen
Yours Truly,
Sebbie
Ant
4th June 2016, 14:42
Seb starts designing his own car…
ia
4th June 2016, 14:51
It all doesn’t add up: Hammy beats me, Nico beats me, Daniel beats me, Max beats me and even Kimi beats me in a Ferrari.
NewVerstappenFan (@jureo)
4th June 2016, 14:57
Turn 1, understeer on entry, snap oversteer on throttle, understeer on exit.
Turn 2, understeer, entry, apex and low overall grip on exit.
Turn 3 twitches to the left in first phase of breaking. Oversteer on entry, understeer on apex and snap oversteer on exit, followed by understeer.
Turn 4, rear tires overheating, fronts to cold, car understeers on entry, plows to corner exit.
Turn 5, fronts up to temperature, rears snap on breaking, contact with the barrier.
Turn 5, sun was nice and marshals very professional.
reh1v2.0 (@reh1v2-0)
5th June 2016, 15:52
lol
ia
4th June 2016, 14:59
Daniel,
I’ m ready for another game of ping pong.
myxtiom (@myxtiom)
4th June 2016, 15:00
Dear Mr Bieber,
I wasn’t on the podium today, but I hope to meet you during your stay in Monaco.
Your look-alike,
Sebastian Vettel
Jason (@jmwalley)
4th June 2016, 15:42
+1
AMR (@aiera-music)
4th June 2016, 15:02
After failing to get on the podium at Monaco, Vettel was given fifty lines.
Jason (@jmwalley)
4th June 2016, 15:41
And how would you rate the performance of your boss, on a scale of 1-5? Please explain.
Little_M_Lo (@pezlo2013)
4th June 2016, 15:50
Another German would be handy…
Corey (@dragon86)
4th June 2016, 15:54
Looks like even Ferrari have fallen into the practice of hiring pay drivers.
Sensord4notbeingafanboi (@peartree)
4th June 2016, 16:06
“Ferrari is faster than RedBull
Ferrari is faster than RedBull
Ferrari is faster than RedBull
Ferrari is faster than RedBull”
Loen (@loen)
4th June 2016, 16:14
Dear Herr Matesseich ( sic ! )
So…..as I was saying only last year, I never wanted to leave
your wonderful team really. It was, just, well…. those bright red cars
I used to play with when I was a boy. So beautiful to look at
and race across the carpet at home.
But…now I have actually driven one…..well, honestly, I just think dark blue
suits my personality better…and then there’s that genius Mr Newey….
So, if you and Senhor Marchionne could have a little money chat…..
…you know…..a few million here, a few hundred million there….
I’m sure I could be back in the right coloured car and the right coloured
race suit as fast as light !
Your ever faithful, very best driver…
Sebastian.
Chris (@tophercheese21)
4th June 2016, 16:29
Sebastian Vettel resorts to completing extra homework after Marchionne says “Ferrari must win” and *poof*: it will magically happen.
His essay is titled: Scuderia Delusions.
Jack Jeffreys (@jack1501)
4th June 2016, 16:41
Insurance Claim:
Cause of Accident: Daniil Kvyat
Nature of Accident: HE CAME LIKE A TORPEDO DIDN’T YOU SEE!!!!
Maddme
4th June 2016, 16:56
Dear Mr Marko,
Since you helped Lewis win, how about letting me win a race too…
Brakius (@brakius)
4th June 2016, 17:02
Dear Diary,
It seems Alonso and I are similar in too many ways. Is this really how it will end?
Geoff (@gglun1)
4th June 2016, 17:53
Sebastian Vettel prepares his second application for a Mercedes seat
Drg
4th June 2016, 17:56
Following the excellent start to his Ferrari career and the first full financial recognition of his abilities.
Sebastián, like many before him, chooses his down time to start the long process of signing over the promised Ferrari shares…
Ashwin (@redbullf1)
4th June 2016, 18:03
Dear Margharita,
I love you from the bottom of my heart. I am starting to feel that you are not satisfying me enough. If things continue like this I will break up with you soon.
Kisses
Vet
bullseyeLT (@bullseyelt)
4th June 2016, 18:12
“Find 10 differences between Ferrari SF16-H and Mercedes W07”
Ana
4th June 2016, 18:34
Dear Michael,
Since I came to Ferrari, I admire your achievements more and more every day.
Get well soon
Seb
erikje
4th June 2016, 18:38
Dear Max,
After putting some feathers in places where they should not belong in spain it’s now time to write you a letter.
Currently i am driving a very nice red car. It’s absolutely stunning!
There’s place for you in this beauty, so please consider it.
If we swap cars you are driving the dream of every 18 year old boy and i can win some races.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Regards SEB
John H (@john-h)
4th June 2016, 19:09
Who needs twitter
Gabriel (@naylamp)
4th June 2016, 19:18
On a side note he grabs the pen as bad as me, with 3 fingers.
Deano
5th June 2016, 11:01
Haha same!!
puneeth Bharath (@puneethvb)
4th June 2016, 19:42
Dear Fernando.,
You were right all along ,sadly..I’ll never win my next title in a red car
Luv
Seb
LATG
4th June 2016, 19:47
Honestly, what are we doing here? Racing, or drawing?
hzh (@hzh00)
4th June 2016, 20:04
“Decreasing margin to Mercedes: check.”
“Winning a race: check… oh wait! This is 2016!”
“Dear McLaren…”
hzh (@hzh00)
4th June 2016, 20:12
“With all respect, I have an offer from Ferrari and I regret to decline your offer. You deserve a better German driver.
Your beloved guy, Nico Rosberg.”
Apexor
4th June 2016, 20:15
Dear diary I want to go back to red bull team I don’t fit in with the reds they have no wings.
urpo (@vfftw)
4th June 2016, 20:26
Seb takes his dislike of social media to another level and shows his preferred method of keeping in touch with his friends.
just.daz (@nemo87)
4th June 2016, 20:34
7 across..
‘Useless’
Thedonz
4th June 2016, 20:37
Hmmm, so there is no escape clause in this contract, too bad they wrote it in pencil, let’s see what we have, here’s a gap, if I just add a few words…..
In his best handwriting vettel adds
‘if the Ferrari F1 team fail to produce a Race winning car for any season or vettel (he’s the best) doesn’t get everything he wants he can leave the team’
Janet54321
4th June 2016, 20:53
“Hallo sweetheart, I’ll be home soon. Do you want some extra nappies for the new baby? Waaaaa!!!! “
bullseyeLT (@bullseyelt)
4th June 2016, 22:19
“Who needs twitter when you can use good old paper and pen instead”
bullseyeLT (@bullseyelt)
4th June 2016, 22:27
“When Kimi said three sentences in a row”
bullseyeLT (@bullseyelt)
4th June 2016, 22:38
Already working hard creating fresh inspirational optimistic quotes and explanations for 2017.
Wesley (@)
4th June 2016, 22:49
“Dear Mom, things are not going as well for me in the F1 world as before. My race car is too slow and people keep running into me. I got a cheeky Russian fired for that though so hopefully its a lesson learned for the rest. I hope to be on the podium pointing my finger again soon. Tell dad I said hello. Love Seb, hugs and kisses.”
ivz (@ivz)
4th June 2016, 23:19
Vettel begins study for an engineering course held by Adrian Newey.
Lex
4th June 2016, 23:33
When the team tells you stop cursing on the radio , so you have to express yourself through poetry.
JungleMartin
5th June 2016, 0:08
Dear Toto…
moblet (@moblet)
5th June 2016, 0:09
Sebastian Vettel writes off his 2016 season.
Pink Peril
5th June 2016, 23:37
^ This.
Ohm (@attakorn)
5th June 2016, 0:26
Sebastian Vettel demonstrating how he thinks a clean overtake should be done.
Ohm (@attakorn)
5th June 2016, 0:29
After being fedup with young drivers banging into him, Sebastian Vettel decides to draw a guide of how a clean overtake should be done.
DB-C90 (@dbradock)
5th June 2016, 1:43
Maurizio, thank you for your support. I wish you well in your next venture.
Regards Sebastian
Sudha S
5th June 2016, 2:26
Pls, let me remember. I need to draw Newey’s designs and give it to Allison. These guys need the help :’-(
Dwight Yoakum (@dwightjs)
5th June 2016, 2:41
Dear Cristian,
They say that at Ferrari, the cars are mighty fine.
But I can’t seem to get mine to go first across the line.
Oh, I don’t want no more Ferrari life.
Christian, I want to go.
But they won’t let me go.
Christian, I wanna come home!
Hugs and Kisses,
Seb.
Richard (@rick1984)
5th June 2016, 3:05
Dear Mr. Dennis
Thanks for your letter, i really found it interesting. I am able to help you with your ‘university project’. Here is a copy of the operations manual for the ferrari SF-16-H. I hope it has all the information you need
Yours
Seb
Craig
5th June 2016, 3:18
Dear Christian: Please come and get me. I’m in the Ferrari garage. Seb.
Jack (@jackisthestig)
5th June 2016, 5:57
Dear Guinness World Records,
Do you have a record for most uses of the F-word during a single transmission of team radio during an F1 race…
Shocks&Awe (@shocksandawe)
5th June 2016, 6:25
Seb writing on his newest rap lyrics, as he works on his fall-back career as advised by Lewis.
“No ice, ice baby,
Kimi’s washed up
I still got it,
Marco-yo wassup?”
alexf1man (@alexf1man)
5th June 2016, 8:04
Vettel seen signing a birthday card for me – however it was side swiped by Kvyat going into the airport.
Deano
5th June 2016, 10:46
Happy Birthday mate!!
AndrewT (@andrewt)
5th June 2016, 10:16
Ferrari mechanics saved this piece of paper when emptying the waste bin after the race:
http://i.imgur.com/j0YBnR6.jpg
Deano
5th June 2016, 10:47
“….can you guess what it is yet?”
Sorry Troops :)
Deano
5th June 2016, 10:59
“…..no world wars and four World Cups, doo dah, doo dah….”
Deano
5th June 2016, 11:04
Dear Joan,
Call me pessimistic, but I don’t think I’m the Vet my Prancing Horse needs.
Seb.
Graham Marchant
5th June 2016, 12:18
Dear Christian I am applying for the job of F1 driver with Red Bull………
Yoseph
5th June 2016, 13:09
1. Alonso was wrong!
2. Alonso was wrong!
3. Alonso was wrong!
4. Alonso was wrong!
……..
3,999. Alonso was wrong!
4000. Alonso was wron….
Robbie (@robbie)
5th June 2016, 13:24
Roses are red
Violets are bluey
Sure wish I still had
Adrian Newey
Rafael (@)
5th June 2016, 13:27
“Dear Mr. Marchionne,
I hereby resign as a grand prix driver in Scuderia Ferrari…
Sincerely,
Sebastian Vettel
4x World Drivers Champion
Cc: Maurizio Arrivabene”
Jeroen Bons
5th June 2016, 13:28
Dear Max,
Thank you for your letter. I can understand why you are fed up with that second hand car that
ruined your race in Monaco. I am willing to take that wreck of your hands.
Is it alright when I forge your signature on the Ferrari application form? And oh.. what was your
date of birth again?
All the best, Seb
Coltrane
5th June 2016, 14:03
Crossword 6. Horizontal:
A former world champion who traded his bull for a prancing horse and now the sun is starting to set on his glory.
S….ti.n V…el
Placid (@placid)
5th June 2016, 19:17
Dear Alexander:
I can help you get a ride with STR. In exchange: I have 2 words – GOT MILK?
lizzy wilson
5th June 2016, 21:29
Seb; How do you spell midel stepp poodeum ? Wish list this is….
Ryan Attwood
6th June 2016, 0:05
Dear Jim, please fix it for me to drive a world championship winning F1 car. From Sebastian, aged 28.
Placid (@placid)
6th June 2016, 0:53
Dear Max:
I really feel your pain.
It is not about the crash at the Massenet. It is about Rossi stealing your spotlight after getting the milk, a ring, the kiss from a princess, a face in the trophy, and a winner’s tour. So sorry you only got a small refrigerator with a 2016 supply of Red Bull after winning Spain.
Placid (@placid)
6th June 2016, 1:01
Dear Manor:
It is so humiliating that Rossi won the Indy 500 and I have not won a race. Why you did not take him?
Bustertje
6th June 2016, 12:11
Dear Helmut, my old friend.
Claire wainwright
6th June 2016, 15:44
Barriers are meant to be kissed not forcebly to tounged
Barriers are meant to be kissed not forcebly tounged
Barriers are meant. ………
Sergey Martyn
7th June 2016, 19:13
“And yesterday I had such a hiding. The master took me by the hair and dragged me out into the yard and beat me with the stirrup-strap because by mistake I went to sleep rocking their baby. And one day last week the mistress told me to gut a herring and I began from the tail and she picked up the herring and rubbed my face with the head. The other apprentices make fun of me, they send me to the tavern for vodka and make me steal the cucumbers and the master beats me with the first thing he finds. And there is nothing to eat. They give me bread in the morning and gruel for dinner and in the evening bread again but I never get tea or cabbage soup they gobble it all rip themselves. And they make me sleep in the passage and when their baby cries I dont get any sleep at all I have to rock it. Dear Grandad for the dear Lords sake take me away from here take me home to the village I cant bear it any longer. Oh Grandad I beg and implore you and I will always pray for you do take me away from here or I’ll die. . . .”
© Chekhov ‘Van’ka’
http://www.eldritchpress.org/ac/vanka.html
gregg pannier
8th June 2016, 17:28
Hello Muddah…
Hello Faddah…
Placid (@placid)
10th June 2016, 1:14
This is Vettel forging Alexander Rossi’s signature.
Dear Mr. Arrivadene:
Please excuse Sebastian Vettel so he can attend Alexander…
jayson biadog
17th June 2016, 11:55
Dear Mercs,
Will you please slow down.
SV
Bob montgomery
13th August 2016, 12:36
Dear Ross…
Mrcento
23rd August 2016, 0:50
After being handed a pen and a clipboard whilst hearing the entire design team has been fired, Sebastien Vettel quickly realises there had been a breakdown in communication after joking to Ferrari President Marchionne that this years car was so bad, he could probably design better himself.