Max Verstappen, Red Bull, Spa-Francorchamps, 2017

Caption Competition 137: Verstappen’s army

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Max Verstappen was not short of support at Spa-Francorchamps this year, although it’s doubtful any of his fans were as well-armed as these two.

However the Red Bull driver’s race ended early due to yet another technical problem.

Can you come up with the best caption for this picture? Post your funniest suggestion in the comments below.

A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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  • 108 comments on “Caption Competition 137: Verstappen’s army”

    1. Verstappen brings his friends to the Renault workshop.

      1. What do you mean by “have they arrested you Max?” ‘Of course not, I have arrested them!! I found them sneaking around my motorhome. Can you imagine “”They told me that they are Belgian soldiers!!.. can you believe that?? SOLDIERS! Just look at their PLASTIC Toy rifles! Ha.. soldiers my a…! Big fun anyway!

    2. Red Bull resorts to drastic measures to ward off interest from other teams.

      1. Brilliant! XD

    3. Not content with the results of his interchanges during races, Verstappen brings reinforcements.

    4. OK, Dietrich, do you really want to hold me to that contract?

    5. So, I’ve heard you didn’t vote for me in the Driver Of The Day poll…

    6. Reb Bull prepare for a drastic change in their downforce concept for 2018.

    7. Renault CEO……Bring him in, I want him alive!!

      1. Now, Cyril, these problems with my engine………………………..

    8. Hey Felipe…

    9. I was wondering how he always got driver of the day

    10. “When I said aim at the tires I did not meant mine… Hey! Keep smiling!”

    11. It seems that Verstappen took Dr. Helmut Markos wise words and advice to heart:

      “Verstappen, you are brilliant but impulsive, young and inexperienced so you must always take protection with you on a first date”

    12. Verstappen introducing the men who caused Ferrari’s punctures at Silverstone.

    13. Renault were surprised to learn that when Max told them he wanted their engines to be ‘bulletproof’, he meant it literally.

    14. Max denied all knowledge about the latest Pirelli blow outs to affect his rivals

    15. I thought the Battle of the Bulge ended in January 1945 ?

    16. Verstappen hires some more… persuasive people to investigate his engine failures within the team

    17. Verstappen pushed very hard during his first stint but as a result, his tyres were shot.

    18. When Renault said they would send reinforcements to Red Bull, this is not what Max had in mind…

    19. This is the only way Max could have a shot at the title this year.

      1. Nice one 👍

    20. Max (in his mind): Soon, Daniel, your car will be mine.

    21. “I heard Maldonado is coming back”.

    22. Having made the track safer with HALO the new FIA safety measures extend to the press circle.

    23. While thousands keep dying and arms producers rake in billions we still think army stuff is cool

      hahahahaaaa! …oh dang no wait sorry that’s tragedy, lemme have another go:

      Max prepares to lower F1 fuel costs by acquiring some oil wells in the middle east

      1. I like both of those.

      2. Not pictured: Max holding his fingers and toes as if ready to shift on a moment’s notice.

        1. Note to the NSA, MI6, Doubleclick, or any other public or private entity tracking or interested in my online existence:
          This is satire against Maciek’ s crazy and ungrateful attitude. I’m God loving, military supporting, and have an unshakable faith in capitalism.

    24. Max laughing:” Atleast wait until he’s through Eau Rouge!”

    25. Hey Christian Meet my mates!
      on a completely unrelated note…
      I really hope my engine doesnt blow up anymore

    26. Max laughing:”Atleast wait until he’s through Eau Rouge!”

    27. Tensions between the Belgian and the Dutch government have reached a boiling point with both sides claiming Max has their nationality.

    28. In an alternate universe where Bernie is still in control of F1:

      Max Verstappen poses with two grid girls at the 2017 North Korean Grand Prix.

      1. Lol

        1. Me too lol.

      2. Completely random. Loved it.

    29. Christian Horner takes extreme measures to keep rival teams from taking his star driver.

    30. Nick (@theawesomefish)
      9th September 2017, 16:50

      Okay, now the 2018 contract negotiations are getting completely out of hand.

    31. Max brought some ‘friends’ to his meeting with Renault

    32. armed and fairly well equipped for a 19 year old. ain’t I? yeah… that’s not a phone in my pocket.

    33. Army guy on the right: I don’t like the way he’s touching me.

    34. In his quest for world domination, young Max Verstappen may have gone overboard a bit

    35. After hearing that Helio is leaving the 4th car open, Max has brought his agent and his lawyer to discuss negotiations for a possible entry into Indy Car.

      Roger: I see you have a possible open spot. Well I am your man. I can become the next face on the Borg-Warner trophy.

    36. Max starts negotiations for his 2018 F1 seat.

    37. Max misunderstands Lewis’s tips on attracting Instagram followers by surrounding yourself with big shots.

      1. Oh yes, hilarious!

    38. Max Verstappen literally scoping the competition

    39. Having settled the rear gunner squabble with Daniel, Max puts his focus on the battle ahead.

    40. Christian, these gentlemen are here to make sure my car has no more unpleasant reliability issues…

    41. ”Yes sir, even shoot the orange ones.”
      ”Really…? Fernando will brake down anyway.”
      ”No, FI gave me this idea, they paid me to keep them apart as well.”

    42. I’m going to complain to helmut marko

    43. That man just in front is called Cyril. When my engine blows up next, he is the man you need to shoot.

    44. Max brings his lawyers to Mercedes to negotiate a contract for Lewis’ seat.

    45. Luis de la garza
      9th September 2017, 19:01

      Anyone wanna play bumper-cars?

    46. “I told you daddy was mad. Now, lets go inspire the mechanics boys!”

    47. Much hilarity ensued after Verstappen requested an SOS to Mercedes and Ferrari and due to a typo error, the SAS arrived instead.

    48. Max – “Sebastian.. I heard you had some issues with my driving”

    49. Max employs a new marketing team to help him get the Number 1 driver spot at Ferrari in 2019.

    50. Max employs “quality control experts” to improve the reliability of his Renault engines.

    51. Max’s “assistant steward’s” make sure his car passes scrutineering.

    52. Verstappen: “As long as you give me an engine that works, nobody gets hurt.”

    53. Verstappen: “So Cyril, I heard you said you don’t understand what I mean with ‘I rather have my engine blow up than software shutting it down’? Let me show you…”

    54. Roth Man (@rdotquestionmark)
      9th September 2017, 20:23

      “That little Brazilian guy said your hats look funny.”

      1. Haha

    55. Verstappen is caught sharing Ricciardo-like smiles at the premiere of the movie about ALO F1 carreer: ”F1 life of Fernando Alonso: a great driver, too many bad decisions. Worst part yet: Honda. Chapter: GP2 engine”

    56. “What the flippin’ heck did you say about me you little dog?!”

    57. Max prepares for his confrontation with Felipe Massa

    58. Max reveals how he got the teams attention on the technical issues.

    59. Max message to RB: no tulips for you until you fix my car

    60. “So you think I’m too convinced of myself? could you repeat that Mr. Massa?”….

    61. “Make my day, Marko”

    62. “So, they can let Sainz go but won’t let me go? Ok then.”

      points to soldier on the left
      “You get Helmut Marko.”

      points to soldier on the right
      “And you get Dietrich Mateschitz.”

    63. “Tom Cruise,erhh Max Verstappen,introduces his new friends to Cyril Abiteboul & Sebastian Vettel”

    64. Roth Man (@rdotquestionmark)
      9th September 2017, 22:17

      As Max’s frustrations build with Renault he proposes a new starter motor prod for his engine.

    65. Max to the Renault guys : I want you to fix my engine, NOW !

    66. Go ahead, make my race.

    67. NEWS:-
      Mercedes boss Toto Wolff has played down the significance of a meeting with Jos Verstappen at the Italian Grand Prix
      MAX:- What do you say now Toto?

    68. Red Bull bringing out the big guns.

    69. Max Verstappen private of the day.

    70. ‘Max wants more money!!!’

    71. Max: when I grow up I want to be a soldier, just like these guys.
      Left soldier: Who is this?
      Right soldier: just some kid, his dad must have brought him. Look there’s alonso let’s go see if we can get his autograph!

    72. Max announces new contract: ….and the new military race team has promised me the largest engine on the field and the ability to crush the opposition.
      Left soldier: what race team?
      Right soldier: no idea, I was talking about driving tanks and changing the direction of his career and he said he wanted to enlist……

    73. F1 Fanatic Headline from March 2019: Shocking new evidence has emeraged implicating defending WDC Max Versappen in Lewis Hamilton’s unfortunate 2017 incident with Belgian security forces.

    74. marco berrevoets
      10th September 2017, 7:43

      verstappen defend hard on the left and the right.

    75. Mad Max tried to pass them both around the next corner, lost control and the soldiers ended up shooting each other!

      PS: The Stewards decided that it was a “racing incident”. No further action.

    76. Verstappen – “At least these guns won’t break down on us guys.”

    77. Hey Danny, these are the dudes I was telling you about. They’ll take care of your telemetry from now on. Cheers mate!

    78. After trying out some camouflage liveries in winter testing, Red Bull takes it to the next level as their teen star introduces next year’s pit crew gear, complete with oddly lifelike wheel guns.

    79. Max brings his opinions to Red Bull – McLaren negotiations about swapping engine deals.

    80. So you don’t like how I defend my position, Seb?

    81. The other drivers wanted more control over Max Verstappen.

    82. “Boys, next one who makes a contact with me on the track will be shot on sight.”

    83. You call them guns. You should see these beauties!!

    84. Max, remembering the way the Ferrari mechanics looked at him after the Mexican GP last year, decided he needed “insurance” while at the Italian GP.

    85. After his meeting with Rémi Taffin, Max suspected a significant upturn in engine reliability

    86. “Well, despite all reliability problems, I just soldier on…”

    87. “Totonator, I’m ready for you”

    88. “Okay guys, do you understand what I’m saying this time? Take out the 3 car. Not the 33 car…the 3 car. Remember…one 3…not two 3’s. Do I have to write this down for you?”

    89. Max to Engineers ” Ok guys next time my engine fails you know who to talk to ;) “

    90. Meet Max’s army, the men more dangerous then Max’s defensive moves!

    91. These bodyguards are the reason why Marko and Horner don’t even think to reply to me when I say something inconvenient to Red Bull. Sainz didn’t have a set of these.

    92. Max realised it would take more than avoiding manoeuvres to keep angry Brazilians away after his massa comment

    93. No more Shoeys, Daniel…

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