Caption Competition 32: Hamilton and Moss

Caption Competition

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Past and present British F1 stars Stirling Moss and Lewis Hamilton met up at Silverstone recently to promote the next race on the calendar, the British Grand Prix.

Submit your funniest caption suggestion for the picture above in the comments and a selection of the best will be chosen for next Saturday’s round-up.

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Image © Mercedes/Hoch Zwei

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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147 comments on “Caption Competition 32: Hamilton and Moss”

  1. MatthewRacing (@)
    15th June 2013, 11:07

    Lewis Hamilton’s braking problems continue as he brakes the steering wheel off Sir Striling Moss’s car…

    1. HAM: Mr Moss why is this steering wheel round?

  2. “Oh no, Mr Moss – someone’s stolen all of your sponsor logos!”

    1. “Actually, young man, we’re both British stars like the article says, but I’m proud to advertize Britain — not a wheelbarrow full of foreign companies.”

  3. LH: “You think they are gonna let us test with this steering wheel?”

  4. Where are the buttons, Sir?

    1. Beaten to it..

  5. “Is that a wheel or a steering, Sterling?”

    1. It is a “steering wheel”, you fool!

  6. “It may be a higher seating position than you’re used to, but you do still need to actually sit in the car.”

  7. “Listen here Lewis, you do NOT remove the steering wheel from Grandad’s car. Understood?”

  8. “I can’t believe how light the steering is, man!”

  9. “Nice earrings. My wife has a pair, too.”

    1. winner!

  10. Lewis: “What do you think, if we say that we put this steering wheel on W03, would FIA consider, that we tested old car?”

  11. “Oops I can’t tweet with this wheel”

  12. thatscienceguy
    15th June 2013, 11:40

    So I heard you had tyre issues. Bolt four of these on and your problem is solved.

  13. Hamilton: “Wooden steering wheel? I though we were driving cars, not sailing a pirate ship.”

  14. Stirling, why did you keep the Australian GP trophy in the cockpit?

  15. Mercedes now have more than just tyre degredation issues to worry about

  16. Stirling Moss: “Back in my day, Lewis, this was the most important wheel on an F1 car”

  17. Well, I hope no one knows something about this test.

  18. After the first few tests Lewis said (regarding the steering wheel) “It was drowning in buttons; all the ones I never use, I eliminated them,” – Looks like he got his wish!

  19. “The lap was great … right up to the moment this came off.”

  20. Moss: “Go on, take it. Your girlfriend may like it as an earring”.

  21. Further proof that you should be careful what you wish for, as Mercedes take Lewis Hamilton’s request to simplify his steering wheel a bit too far.

    1. Very good also!

    2. Chris (@tophercheese21)
      15th June 2013, 13:39

      Love this one!

  22. This looks interesting Sir… Could you please tell me from which pipe you stole this tap when you were a lad?

  23. “Of course you can drive it Lewis, you’re not a woman are you?”

  24. beep beep..

  25. “Try this… It’ll go faster than the one your racing on”. “But I can’t sir, This car doesn’t comply with the F1 rules” “Look buddy, just say it’s a sort of a test thing for Pirelli”

  26. Gav (@foxtrotoscar21)
    15th June 2013, 12:45

    So this second Pirelli test is definitely legal now it’s not the Mercedes W04..?

  27. Lewis preparing for the punishment Mercedes are about to receive from the FIA

    1. Haha! I like this one!

  28. My car is better, but how do you get your overalls so white?

  29. Moss: So I told Kimi, power steering problems…Finn please!

  30. You think F1 is difficult now? Well back in my day, we didn’t even attach the steering wheel to the car.

  31. Moss: “Lewis, my boy, as long as you can control that wheel in your hand, you’ll never need to bother about any others on the car.”

  32. Am I holding the steering wheel upside-down?

  33. “…and then I overtook Glock in the last corner to win the championship by a single point. Do you know how it feels like?”
    “You must be joking…”

    1. Hahaha gooood one :D

  34. And I thought the set of wheels I pulled were big!

  35. ‘Compared to mine, this is wheely basic’

  36. SM: “At night i take it home and use it to make pizzas”
    LH: “By the looks of it you make a fair few”

  37. So where did you store all the secret Pirelli information?

  38. Hamilton: But what is this??!!!
    Moss: what the… you broke my wheel man!! get out of my car.

  39. Dave Edwards
    15th June 2013, 13:37

    Stirling: “You fool – they said to turn up in blank overalls…”

  40. Jack (@jackisthestig)
    15th June 2013, 13:38

    “Is this a toy for my dog?”

  41. Alex (@korbendallas)
    15th June 2013, 13:49

    “So this was our wood block, and if it wasn’t at least one millimetre thinner by the end of the race you weren’t driving hard enough.”

  42. JimmyTheIllustratedBlindSolidSilverBeachStackapopolis III
    15th June 2013, 13:53

    Thanks moss this is perfect for my submarines hatch

    1. JimmyTheIllustratedBlindSolidSilverBeachStackapopolis III
      15th June 2013, 13:57

      Wow so this is a 1950’s wrist watch it’s amazing how technology gets more and more compact over the years.

      1. JimmyTheIllustratedBlindSolidSilverBeachStackapopolis III
        15th June 2013, 14:33

        Of course we soon connected the steering wheel extended the gear shift brought the foot pedals closer and attached a seat so you don’t get blown backwards off the car, but in those days we didn’t have access to all the knowledge teams have now. So we didn’t know we were making mistakes until we tryed something.

  43. “I think you have the strength, Lewis, but I don’t know if you’ve got the mental aptitude to race hard with this wheel. And those earrings don’t help.”

  44. Lewis,”You want me to put this where Sir? “, Moss, “Well it’s mostly the right color son”

  45. And Fangio had a modern one Sterling ?

  46. Michael (@freelittlebirds)
    15th June 2013, 14:19

    Yes Lewis, this is the one that cost me a WDC.

  47. LH: “strange, this looks like a BMW steering wheel”

  48. What in the world how do you pass where is the DRS and KERS buttons?

    1. Lol rubbish!

  49. So where’s the radio again?

  50. get your hand off my wheel, kid!

  51. So where is the lap time delta displayed?

  52. “You young drivers have too many buttons and too many zits !”

  53. I can feel it . . . . .

  54. Mike the bike Schumacher (@mike-the-bike-schumacher)
    15th June 2013, 15:31

    Moss: Now you take your hands off the steering wheel and wave to the pretty woman!

  55. “Now listen here boy, back in my day DRS meant ‘Drink Rum & Soda’ !!”

  56. No buttons! Wicked got get myself one of these!

  57. Look how light the steering wheel is! Even a girl could drive with it don’t you think Sir Stirling?

  58. – My, my, Lewis! Those earrings are really bring out your beautiful smile.
    – Aww, thanks homie.

  59. Sorry old man, I think the wheel came off your wheel chair.

  60. Sir Moss- Which wheel actualy is this?

  61. “Tree, it was like the carbon-fiber of the 50’s”

  62. My god man back in my day they only stole the wheels. Bloody hoodlums

  63. This steering wheel suits the Mercedes Bus that travels around Monaco

  64. They said you tried to kill Rubens Barichello by shoving him off the pit wall…. you don’t look like that Schumacher guy !?!

  65. “You see those birds over there? Right, here’s what you say to ’em…”

  66. Son, don’t ever let a girl touch your steering wheel.

  67. “How did you ever manage to make a face imprint in this !?”

  68. “Where’s the button to declare women aren’t good enough to drive in F1?”

  69. Lewis ” we had a button for going slowly in the the McLaren……we called it Jenson”

    1. Rick Lopez (@viscountviktor)
      17th June 2013, 9:06


  70. With all due respect sir, “Please let me drive!!”

  71. So what you are really is saying is between us we are one quarter plant and three quarters Scottish?

  72. This will blow Nico’s mind when he see’s what I’ve done to his car.

  73. “Hey Lewis, could you give me a hand setting up the gaming wheel for my PS3?”

  74. Lewis has a go on Sterling’s vintage 1950s F1 Simulator!

    1. I have refined it a bit:

      Lewis was surprised at the simplicity of Sterling’s 1950s F1 simulator!

  75. Another Mercedes secret wheel test…

  76. Jenson, you aged quite a bit in these last few months….I don’t know what to tell you, man, but the steering wheel in the Merc is way smaller than this…..

  77. lewis:”hahaha…..that’s one wood we can hang on to,if it crashes…”

  78. LH: Did you nick this off Mike Gascoyne’s yacht?

  79. Lewis takes driving the wheels off the car a little too bit literally.

  80. Lewis: Sir, I seem to have taken the steering wheel off and now I can’t put it back. You know, old habits die hard.
    Moss: Oh don’t you worry son, they’ll all know it was your fault.

  81. (with regards to Sir Stirling’s notorious remarks on women in motorsport):

    “Lewis, m’boy, I’ve always believed that racing is a real man’s sport- you see, racing isn’t for sissies or women. Yet somehow I’ve heard some lass by the name of Britney has been faster than you this year!”

  82. Sir Moss: Hey Lewis now imagine the size of the gear shift!

  83. So this is a steering wheel, its round and has no buttons, it’s for turning right and left. You should use one of those sometimes, i won races with it…

  84. “I’d never noticed your eyes before, Lewis.”

  85. Lewis: yo this steering wheel is pretty light light sir Stirling, a girl could drive with one of these don’t you think?
    Moss: erm….

  86. paul heyfron
    15th June 2013, 22:20

    lewis : great no buttons
    sterling : yes now imagine its attached to a red bull and your a winner

  87. If I use this the FIA will never know we tested this years car

  88. Lewis: Wow, no buttons. Racing must have been really easy in your days.

  89. ‘So tell me, what is it like driving a ship?’

  90. It’s almost as simple as you Lewis!

    1. @naz3012 I actually properly love this one! Stirling’s face has an intent to hurt him written all over it in that snap as well, which just completes this!

  91. Lewis to Stirling, “lol, what’s this…”

  92. Stirling Moss has bigger wheels than Lewis Hamilton even these days in age

  93. Blistering

  94. Moss: so this is what you’ll tell the tribunal you were using ok?!

  95. Hamilton: What is this?
    Moss (speaking slowly so Lewis understands): That’s a steering wheel. It turns the car. (sotto voce) Idiot.

  96. It’s…my wife, she made me ware the pyjamas.

  97. Lewis: “Ohh…. i swear i was very gentle with the car”

  98. Sir i asked for steering wheel not water valve handle.

  99. Moss: “You go ahead and ride my car. Now, you let me drive your Pussycat Doll !”…..

  100. Rob (@abs0lutism)
    16th June 2013, 11:15

    See Sonny the only thing I could change on my steering wheel was the varnish!

  101. “I like the quick release!”

  102. SM: Why did you pull that out, Its not supposed to come out!!

  103. Ryan (@ryanisjones)
    16th June 2013, 17:03

    Sometimes Lewis – and I’m sure Nicole would agree – you need real wood…

  104. Where is the DRS button?

  105. Hamilton: ”So will I still be overtaken by a Williams in this car?”

  106. HAM: “getting a lot of understeer..”
    HAM: “needs less buttons”

  107. Ben (@scuderia29)
    16th June 2013, 20:54

    Moss “you can borrow my car to test pirelli’s new compounds if you would like lewis?”
    Hamilton “no thanks grandad, theres cameras around”

  108. Honest… it just came of in me hands….

  109. Which bus did you boost this from, grandad?

  110. Lewis “Am I really supposed to hit Niko with this?”

  111. C’mon grand dad, surely you didn’t get any chicks with this?

  112. And you were on a tight budget, yeah? Didn’t get much Sterling back then?

  113. How did you have any grip with these tires?

  114. Listen son, this isn’t a steering wheel, we used four of these as actual wheels. So stop complaining
    about those Pirelli’s and imagine how it is to race with these wooden puppies!

  115. “There’s no buttons here… neither is Jenson!”

  116. No Lewis, you can’t use this for the bus Vettel says you drive.

  117. Sterling to Lewis: “Mine was bigger than yours.. Here, have a feel….”

  118. You have to attach to drive Lewis I hope you know that …………

  119. Stirling- that’s another fine you are due, even I know the steering wheel has to be put back after you get out!

  120. madwinchester
    18th June 2013, 9:05

    That’s right, and then I’d take it with me to the shops so nobody could steal the car.

  121. So anyway Stirling, did you drive a racing car or a Dover to Calais Ferry with this wheel?

  122. LH: “This isn’t a trophy!”

  123. You would never have made it into F1 with that hairstyle

  124. The steering wheel is alot bigger compared to mine
    Oh yeah, my balls are bigger than yours aswel

  125. I bet they can’t change this in 3 seconds.

  126. Vroom! Vroom! Lewis Hamilton pretends to be a stunt pilot while his company-appointed grandfather Stirling Moss looks on.

  127. SM: Hi I am Dr. Evil and this is my Minime.

    LH: That’s one heck of a Minime but it won’t fit into my girlfriend’s purse.

  128. …and so, Lewis, if you stay detached from women like my old steering wheel here …… then they wont drive you around the bend !!!

  129. HAM-“And what is this called, Grampa?”
    MOS-“It’s called a STEERING WHEEL you fool!!!!!”

Comments are closed.