Max Verstappen, Pierre Gasly, Daniil Kvyat, Alexander Albon, 2019

Caption Competition 156: Red Bull F1 drivers

Caption Competition

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Red Bull have chopped and changed their driver line-up again, swapping Pierre Gasly for Alexander Albon ahead of the next race in Belgium.

Can you come up with the best caption for this picture of the pair with team mates Max Verstappen and Daniil Kvyat? Post your funniest suggestion in the comments below.

A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the RaceFans Round-up.

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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  • 97 comments on “Caption Competition 156: Red Bull F1 drivers”

    1. If I put my fingers in my ears I won’t hear Dr Marko.

    2. Derek Edwards
      17th August 2019, 8:31

      Max is the only one to remain unconvinced despite the Renault engineer’s valiant attempts to show him what their “1,000 horsepower” engine can do.

    3. Red bull drivers wonder who is next for the chop

    4. “Max didn’t smile like the other drivers – Max knew what today’s lesson meant!”

    5. just a observation: Max’s ears facing more backward than from the others.
      Wearing to much / to often helmets during a young age?

    6. Verstappen: – “This is what Dr Marko Will do to your carreers If you get lapped by me in the race”

    7. “Here are two wheels for you, Pierre. Helmut told me you’d be needing a bike.”

    8. Max thinking to himself…’Hey Pierre, if you want to help, maybe you could get the axe.’

    9. “Slice of giant cucumber anyone?”

    10. Pedro Andrade
      17th August 2019, 8:58

      Intriguingly, Dr. Marko’s motivational techniques failed to bring Pierre Gasly a more serene state of mind.

    11. And the winner for the 2020 seat is……

    12. Helmut Marko demonstrates what will happen to Alex Albon if he doesn’t get pole position, the race win and the fastest lap point at the Belgian Grand Prix.

    13. Marko tests RB drivers’ capacity to listen to his advice

    14. Pat Ruadh (@fullcoursecaution)
      17th August 2019, 9:22

      Max was feeling confident, having logged many hours in the simulator

    15. The question on their minds: “Can I make the cut?”

    16. How many Bulls will a Red Bull chop when each of the Red Bulls flop.

      1. Not bad – not bad at all :)

    17. Ironically, this image is from this video filmed ahead of the Canadian GP, and I guess this little thing Alex did to Max is what ultimately earned him the nod:
      https://youtu.be/DUbcVA_7aiE?t=108

    18. Having worn out his old one, Dr Marko sends his drivers out to obtain a new chopping block.

    19. Dave Allwright
      17th August 2019, 9:30

      Why have the HR Department brought us to their team-team building day?

    20. Woodsman: “…and the number of rings inside the log represents the number of drivers dropped by Red Bull over the years”

    21. Dr Marko warning all his drivers that things will be different and less humane the next time someone underperforms

    22. Dr Marko
      -This block used to be Jaime Alguersuari. Then he was dropped from the program.

    23. Red Bull trialing new gear as drivers ‘getting the axe’ proves increasingly inefficient

    24. Max: “Come on guys. It’s loud, but not Marko debrief loud.”

    25. All of Red Bull drivers are bracing themselves for Marko’s decision, except Max who doesn’t have to be afraid.

    26. This is how you make the cut boys

    27. Dr Markos “visual metaphor” of him doing to the drivers career what he did to Gaslys was clear for all to see.

    28. Dr Marko continues to use his method of counting tree rings to determine how many laps the number 2 driver gets before being demoted

    29. Cristiano Ferreira
      17th August 2019, 10:48

      Red Bull decides to compete in soapbox races and is building their first chassis. Pierre Gasly will be driving the RBSBC 1 (Red Bull Soap Box Cart 1) once the season starts.

    30. We nicknamed this piece of wood “Kvyat” because of the amount of times we’re going to cut it.

    31. The new Saw film was perhaps the most horrific yet. Young drivers would be tortured by Max until they inevitably got the axe.

    32. Stihl brings out the new ‘Verstappen’ model chainsaw…’Its does all the hard work’

    33. Behind every canadanian is a chainchaw and a wood but almost in front of every bull is a career as fast as thule

    34. Max muses “I’ve just got to get dad one of those for Father’s Day.

    35. “This is a test guys. Can you cope with the noise the 2020 Honda engine will produce? Well I see you can Max….”

    36. You can tell which Red Bull driver actually grew up around screaming Formula1 cars

      1. Yes indeed tobad it isn’t a comment from the guys itself!

    37. Max: ‘I wonder if that would work on Vettel’

    38. Max thinking: “That tree bark must feel the same way as Pierre, each time I creep up his rear mirror to lap him”

    39. This is a demo of our new technique for reducing excess driver weight

    40. “Relax guys. This is just the way my Dad likes to say hello to my little friends.”

    41. KYV: “loud, yikes!”
      ALB: “loud, crazy!”
      GAS: “loud, scary!”
      VER: “How I can do this faster than this guy? Where is he losing time?”

      1. This is eerily plausible – gets my vote!

    42. Donald Bennett
      17th August 2019, 13:20

      Pierre, daniil, Alex: wow!
      Max: why is your saw so small?

    43. Verstappen wonders if he has found his stolen go-cart engine.

    44. Kvyat “you know Max, hearing loss is permanent?”
      Verstappen “what!?”

      1. @slotopen – nice :) And a nice change from all the “cutting/chopping block/axing” captions.

    45. Verstappen “so you boys all know what that feels like then!”

    46. Helmut Marko chopping Gasly’s career in half.

    47. What?!
      I lived with Jos, you can’t imagine how loud he was shouting while “talking” to my mother.

    48. Max wondering why he never gets a phone call from Helmut.

    49. Some believes cutting testing will improve unpredictability…

    50. “So this is what Marko meant with Cutting Edge Technology?”

    51. Josh (@canadianjosh)
      17th August 2019, 15:29

      Max= not fazed at all(bored almost)
      Albon= Squealing like a girl while giggling
      Kvyat= Looks like the teachers pet( nice safety glasses as well)
      Gasly= looks absolutely terrified! Lol

    52. Josh (@canadianjosh)
      17th August 2019, 15:43

      Also looks like a father teaching his 4 sons….You have Max who is the best at everything and is his fathers favourite, next is Alex who Father Marko fears may be swinging for the other team and hopes to toughen him up with this early morning lesson, then there Daniil who is always in trouble, maybe putting him to work will stop the visits to the principals office, also he has a mild case of ADHD, then there’s little Pierre, daddy Marko is just happy he got him outside with his brothers as he spends far toomuch time inside watching cartoons and playing with his Batman dolly.

    53. Only Max is unimpressed with this demonstration of using the undercut.

    54. Max, watching Jos, cutting the Red Bull career log, the slices representing the drivers…

      Well, that’s Kvyat on the floor and Pierre following… I wonder if Albon can stay within half a second…

    55. The master only hears the flutter of checkered flags

    56. Franz Tost demonstrates the new STR 14A chainsaw.

    57. Max is the only one not convinced by Adrian’s demonstration of using “Chainsaw Flying Dust” as a way of getting around the Computational Fluid Dynamics rules.

    58. Max decides it is impolite to tell the lumberjack how to reduce the time of each cut by 2 seconds.

    59. Max is like this is what I consider wheel to wheel

    60. The boys couldn’t decide what noise they were trying to silence most, the chainsaw or Queen’s “Another one bites the dust” blaring from the speakers out of shot.

    61. Who’s next to get the chop?

    62. Whilst his team mates worry about noise in the here and now, Max is thinking ahead and sees a way to massacre his rivals in the USGP in Austin, Texas

    63. Before completing his public service penality, Max Verstappen was sent to inspect the development of the new device that is once built in, expected to enhance the sound of the engines.

    64. After studying the demo, Verstappen ask if he could strap then chain saw to is front wing.

    65. #PoweredByHonda

    66. The Woodcutter divides log into portions to represent the driver’s points tally. Safe to say, this next cutting represents all of Pierre’s contribution towards Red Bull’s constructors tally.

      1. Max: Where’s the blood?

    67. This is how V10 engine sounds like guys.

    68. This time in four part harmony…
      🎼 He’s a lumberjack and he’s OK….🎵

    69. After marko, this is music to my ears

    70. Instructor – “Ok everyone without ear muffs put your hands over your ears”.
      Max – “There’s too many rules for everything these days.”

    71. Dr. Marko always liked to begin his annual sacrifice with a decoy run.

    72. For our Red Bull Development program we’re looking for another chip of the old block.

    73. Stephen Higgins
      18th August 2019, 13:00

      Max: “I really hope that’s not going in the back of my car for Belgium …”

    74. Gasly: “These team building retreats are so strange.”
      Albon: “I wonder if he does chainsaw carving.”
      Kvyat: silence…
      Max: “I like those New Balance sneakers.”

    75. Franz Tost relishes the opportunity to finally get his hands dirty and do some cutting

    76. RedBull chainsaw massacre.

    77. One shirt, two shirt, Red shirt, Blue shirt.
      This log will soon be gone.
      Pierre please take that Red shirt off,
      And give it to Albon.

    78. Magnus Rubensson (@)
      19th August 2019, 14:37

      Tost: “Gather around, boys. Once upon a time, many years ago, there was a tiny little racing team. All the other racing teams were big and powerful, but this racing team only had a tiny shed and David Coulthard.”
      Drivers: “Oooo… a LONG time ago!”
      Tost: “Aye… it was so long ago that F1 cars were powered by wood generator gas. Before every race, we had to chop firewood for race car fuel! Like this! See?”
      Drivers: “Oooo…”
      Tost: “Sometimes we didn’t even have wood. We had to chop a piece out of the shed. Then every morning, dr Marko got up at 2°in the morning and beat us all with a stick. Christian Horner lived in a lake!”
      Albon, Kvyat & Gasly: “Oooo…”
      Max: “Hmm… not sure I believe you anymore…”
      Tost: “Arrrrh… aye, the noise, the fumes… those were the days, boys. Aye, those were the days!”

    79. You think you’re fully prepared but too late realise you’re chopping a log with trainers on.

    80. Magnus Rubensson (@)
      19th August 2019, 16:09

      This is how we make the new carbon-free environmental brake pads.

      1. Magnus Rubensson (@)
        19th August 2019, 16:11

        um, I sort of meant brake discs … d-oh!
        aargh… :D

    81. NeverElectric
      20th August 2019, 3:44

      Alexander, this is what happens to you if Max laps you two races in a row – you get sliced.

    82. Verstappen fails to convince his stablemates that these newfangled turbo era chainsaws are not as loud as the classic normally aspirated versions of the old days.

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